With Eyes Wide Shut
by kingofsteves17
Summary: The POV of Onigumo and how he feels about Kikyo and the devastation created by Naraku. Based on the song, With Eyes Wide Shut by BlessTheFall. I would recommend listening to that song while reading this.


Characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi, I only wrote the fanfic. Reviews are greatly appreciated.

* * *

They won't work, and you know that. Yet you try to help me even when I'm immobile.

 _Why?_

 _Why me?_

 _Why this cursed body that has no ounce of life in it anymore and renders useless to anyone that can see?_

Ah. Now I get it. You try to help everyone, and you thought that it would be in your better judgement to help this poor fellow than to leave him to the vultures. Heh, how thoughtful. But I never needed your charity.

I appreciate it, nonetheless. Seeing you scatter about, making the porridge to feed me or to change what bandages you could. If my arms worked, I would not hesitate to pull you into my embrace. To show you just how much it means to me that you, a young lass, feels the need to take care of me, a worthless human that has no desire to live in this world anymore.

The kindness you show me has never once crossed my path before. And for that I am grateful.

* * *

A few candlelight's light up the small cave, illuminating her in its glow. Alas, I wish for sunlight, to see her ethereal beauty shine in more ways than one.

Complaints never heard, remorse never felt, and gratitude never spoken of.

And she doesn't seem to mind at all.

My eyes lock on her movements as she moves next to me on the hard, cave floor. She looks uncomfortable sitting on her legs in that position, but when she leans over me to feed me, again, complaints go unheard.

Happiness was never anything I've felt before. Rage, betrayal, abandonment. They left when I was in need, and stole back what loyalty I gave them.

But this. What this emotion is right now, could be described as happiness. Seeing her just sit by me and idly chat with my broken body excites me and makes me utterly wish for movement.

She has probably made a lot of people feel how I feel at this moment. The satisfaction of being able to make her even smile slightly turns me over to the greatest victory I've achieved so far.

* * *

Love is such a tender thing that can be pierced and broken up into millions of tiny particles. It's what I feel emanating from your body right now, and it's sickening.

You left a while ago, to go see that pitiful hanyou you keep talking to me about. Disgusting, that you would fall for such a vile creature.

Silence enveloped me, and then the voices. Many, talking over one another, muttering terrible things and how they wanted to get back at the miko who slayed their kin. And they were talking to me. And I agreed.

 _Take me. My soul and body will be yours. Just let me have her and be at peace._

The deed has been done, and has gone horribly wrong. I did not want this outcome to unfold, no. I just wanted her to myself, nothing more. Now they're both dead. One pinned to a tree (whom I could care less about), and the other, burned to a crisp buried six feet under the rotting earth.

With a moveable body and a mind that does not answer to my every whim, I am stuck. Stuck in this hellish void that I have no idea how to escape from.

He does not hear me. Does not even respond. Many people have perished by his- _ **my-**_ hand and it sickens me to know. Youkai, humans, they're all the same. Greedy and uncaring, but wanting nothing to do with death itself until the moment arises.

Why did you have to go with him? We could have had a life together if you never chose that worthless half demon, but instead you betrayed me, just like everyone else. So maybe your death was worth it. Now I can live in peace.

* * *

I miss the way you always looked at me when we were talking, or when you were making my supper, or even changing my bandages.

I miss the way you took care of me in more ways than I could have ever hoped for. You were worth me being unable to move.

He's shut me out now, for the first time. I no longer have control over my mind like he has given me before. He's in full control now, and I am yet again useless and immobile.

Darkness folds over and across my numb body and I reluctantly close my eyes, feeling safe and secure in its hold.

I wish to see you again, and let you know how I truly feel without saying it only in my mind. I hope we meet again, for I feel as if I am dying all over again and without you here only makes it more painful.

At least it's calm now. I can rest easily for a little while before I fully go away, and have him gain control of everything.

I truly miss you.

Let us meet in our dreams tonight, Kikyo.


End file.
